This is a Shingeki no Kyojin fanfic. [ReaderxArmin] One-shot. Armin reads the letter you wrote in case you did not return. I do not own Attack on Titan or any part of it.
Armin knocked quietly on the door to Levi’s office.
“Enter,” came the flat voice from within, and Armin promptly obeyed, greeting the Corporal with a salute.
“You asked for me, Sir?” he said, politely.
The Corporal searched Armin’s face impassively for a few moments before responding.
“Armin,” he said softly. “As you know, [NAME] was killed in today’s Titan encounter. A letter was found amongst her personal effects. That letter was addressed to you.”
He handed a small envelope to Armin and waved him out the door. Armin made his way outside and settled with his back against a tree, before gently unfolding the letter and proceeding to read.
If you are reading this letter, then I have not returned from our mission. If this is the case, then I have died before raising the courage to tell you how I feel. I can kill a Titan without a second thought, but I’m too much of a coward to speak my heart. Go figure.
I know you are probably blaming yourself right now. That’s just what you’re like. You view every loss as a personal failure, as though you murdered each of them in their beds. You and the Corporal are a lot alike in that way, except he hides it better.
I want to be able to hold you as you grieve. I want to look into those beautiful blue eyes and tell you this isn’t your fault, to remind you that nobody can know what will happen, to show you the figures that prove how many people are still living because of your planning. I want to be there for you, but I can’t. I’m sorry.
I wish I had the courage to tell you how much you have meant to us. How much you have meant to me. How you made my life so much more bearable.
When I felt trapped by the walls, you were there with stories of faraway places. You would tell us of great bodies of salty water called oceans, huge fields of ice that never melt, even in the heat of summer and fish as big as Titans.
When I was nearly paralysed with the fear of Outside, you would be there with your maps and your plans, and I would feel less fearful, more secure, more hopeful of return.
When the terrors visited me in the night, it was the kindness in your eyes and the calmness in your voice that slowly settled my heartbeat and lulled me back to sleep.
You allowed me to keep my sanity in world gone insane.
I want to thank you, Armin.
Thank you for my sanity.
Thank you for my courage.
Thank you for my hope.
I love you, Armin Arlert,
Forever and Always,
“I love you, too,” Whispered Armin, allowing the tears to roll silently down his cheeks.