‘Twas the Night Before Christmas

‘’Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.’

I wish.  It sure as hell isn’t that quiet in our house, let me tell you. There’s no popping off to bed early, dreaming of sugar plums (whatever the hell they are) and waiting for good old St Nick here. No, here it’s all noise and bickering and chaos.

To start with, today is the day our in-laws all decide to pop in for a quick visit and every. Single. One just has to give the kids candy canes and biscuits and lollies. So now we have a house full of kids all hopped up on sugar, bouncing off the walls and generally making a racket. I think I’m getting a headache. At least this year, we actually managed to get them to eat dinner.

It’s getting late, though, and I’m going to get little enough sleep as it is, so it’s time to (try to) herd the hippos into bed. First, we need to place the stockings outside their bedroom doors. And here is where our first crisis hits. Susie’s stocking is missing and I told them all to keep their stocking in their underwear draw so they wouldn’t get lost, but I’m only Mum, what would I know?

So the next half hour is spent turning Susie’s room upside down, and guess who gets to clean up that mess? Eventually, the stocking turns up in her brother’s underwear draw and what it’s doing there is anybody’s guess.

Now, it’s time to put food out for Santa. Susie wants the traditional milk and cookies but John insists on Bundy and Cola with a bowl of nuts. It takes a while, but we eventually convince John that Santa cannot drink and drive, but we place a bowl of nuts beside the biscuits. And now John and Susie are arguing over what kind of biscuits Santa likes. I’m just about ready to throttle them by the time they settle on one of each.

Ok, I’ve finally got them all in bed. No Susie, you cannot have one more story. Yes, John, you can have some water, but make it quick. Jane, stop crying, I will leave a carrot out for the reindeer. Now everybody get into bed now or I’ll tell Santa you were naughty.

Aah. Peace at last. Time to sit down with a glass of wine and hope it doesn’t take long for the munchkins to get to sleep. Susie, what are you doing up? Why didn’t you go before? Just hurry up! Jane, be quiet and go to sleep. John, put the book away and GO TO BLOODY BED!

2AM. Are they asleep? Well, finally! Sneaking about, quietly shifting gifts from my wardrobe to under the tree; filling the stockings, trying hard not to rustle packaging; terrified of waking the sleeping children. Half an hour later, I drop like a rock onto my bed, knowing I will be woken before first light.

‘’Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.’  Ha! Yeah, right! What planet is this guy living on?


This week’s story prompt is ‘Twas the night before Christmas’ from Essential Kids.

Categories: Fiction Friday

Tags: , , , , , ,

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