Two jobs

The chief constable of a small Yorkshire town was also an expert veterinary surgeon. One night the telephone rang. The chief constable’s wife answered it. “Is Mr Blank there?” inquired an agitated voice. “Do you want my husband in his… Read More ›


Men don’t get lost – they simply discover alternative destinations. — Allan & Barbara Pease in Why Men Lie and Women Cry Related articles Why men lie and women cry (


Mother: ‘Today I want you to take your brother Eddie to the zoo.’ Roy: ‘Not me. If they want him they’ll have to come get him.’ —Herbert V Prochnow & Herbert V Prochnow Jr. in ‘Jokes, Quotes & One Liners… Read More ›


‘Some plants,’ said the biology teacher, ‘have the prefix “dog”. For instance, there is the dogwood, the dogviolet. Who can name another plant prefixed by “dog”?’ ‘I can,’ shouted the little boy in the back row. ‘How about “collie flower”?’… Read More ›

New priest

A new priest was so nervous at his first Mass that he could hardly speak. After Mass he asked the Monsignor how he had done. The Monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put… Read More ›